What's In A Name?

Running an errand kept me sitting on a chair for two solid hours while facing the OFFLINE sign. The friction between my ass and the chair under me was so irritating that killing the person next to me was a very welcome diversion from my boredom. No, actually, I was not bored. I only complained of the aching numbness in my ass.

Boredom has no place in a small town where two or three strangers can gather in anybody’s name and talk about his or her life or the life of others from cradle to grave. We were enclosed in one storey of a building, half of it looked like a congressional session hall and the other half looked like a street corner where everybody gathers for the latest update on the neighborhood buzz. I belonged to the latter half.

An elderly woman who spits out droplets of saliva every time she talks first complained about the air-conditioning unit which seemed to be the most useless appliance in the room. As she fanned herself she talked about her daughter who met a man from England in the internet. The “Kano” as what she called the man from England is a very good man and he sends them money regularly for their sustenance. As she talked about the generosity of their foreign benefactor her audience nodded in admiration to the man from England whom they called “Kano” and envied the fortune of the elderly woman who spits droplets of saliva every time she talks.

The elderly woman wasn’t the only one with a foreign funding in the room. As soon as she finished her story another one butted in. She married an Australian and her papers are now being processed and she is due to leave anytime soon. Another is pregnant courtesy of a man from Canada and the “Kano” is flying into the country within the week to be there with her when she delivers the baby. As I sat in the bench feeling the numbness in my ass crawling up my spine, I prayed to God to send some angels from the heavens on high and tell them that they could not possibly call a man from England, Canada and Australia as “Kano”. Their foreign benefactors would be gravely insulted should they ever find out they were called "Kano".

But before I say "Amen" I stopped myself and think. The "Kano" issue is so petty its not worth my prayer. The angels are too damn busy on some bigger issues that they don't concern themselves with how one should call the other. "What's in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet". Yeah, right. Dollars would smell as sweet whether they came from Canada, Australia or England.

As I changed my mind and shifted from my seat, I said a little prayer and said Amen as soon as I finished. "Dear Lord, with all humility I ask You, please send some angels from the heavens on high and let them take away the OFFLINE sign. My ass hurts from the numbness and the numbness is now slowly crawling up my spine. My right sleeve is almost wet with saliva droplets and my head aches from the odor and the heat. Have mercy on your child that has to "Kano" story to share and no dollars to smell. Amen."