Friends And Friendship

My neighboring table at an uptown coffee shop was noisy. I looked up impatiently from the source of the noise and saw a group of middle-aged women greeting each other like they haven't seen each other for millions of years. When my companion stood up to join the noisy group she told me that they were her high school classmates. I put down the copy of the contract we were discussing and looked at them in envy.

I remembered my own set of high school friends. Like us, they must have been unruly and restless. Each one must have their share of pain and glory in varying degree and intensity. Their dignified looks and refined manners must have been the product of life’s greatest lesson they experienced in the last 30 years or so of their lives.

The hugs and kisses were a prelude for a discussion galore that took place as soon as everyone was settled in their seats.And so it goes that I took the occupation of an eavesdropper! I smiled as someone makes a funny remark or shook my head when everyone started comparing their accessories, dresses and bags! I almost joined them when they started commenting on the newspaper article! The second time they hugged and kissed ended their session and each one headed towards the door and into their cars.

I was left recalling my own teenage years and wondering what I will be in the next 30 years or so. Charles Dickens' " it was the best of times, it was the worst of times" couldn't be more than appropriate in describing a teenage life. That despite the raging hormones, identity crises, family feuds and peer pressures, friends and friendship survives. Nobody may have survived unscathed and unhurt but each survivor relied heavily on the strength of friendship, strength strong enough to make them through the next arena of life.

There was a time when silence was all we could ever afford to offer each other. We become by-standers and spectators as the life of our friends unfold. The friendship took the back seat when priorities where sorted out: universities, careers, lovers, new friends, family. Does the embers of a burning friendship finally turned into cold ashes? No, it is still there in bright flaming red....waiting...ready...burning...

It did burn...again. Suddenly, everyone came running at the faintest sound of a distress call. Calls were made on special occassions, visits were done unannounced, wines are poured for no reason at all. What power is strong enough to destroy a good friendship? None.

I imagined us to be like those middle-aged women sitting in the the table next to me. Someday, when all our hairs are white (or dyed black), we will meet somewhere for coffee, dinner, party and God-knows-what, our friendship stronger more than before. We may never be able to dignify our looks or refine our manners, but our bond of friendship is solid and untouchable.

This is my first blog of the year. And I would like to offer it to a very good friend who is the first to reach the most dreaded 32nd year of our life. Happy birthday, Aileen! You are now out of the calendar and into the game of bingo! Enjoy it and don't worry. I am very close behind.